What should be your next phone?

A lot of people ask me what type of phone they should buy since I'm the go-to person for this type of stuff. Or maybe it's because I'm the only asian person they talk to so they think I would have good ideas. Either way, it's time for tech-geek post. Sorta took a while for one of these...

Reasons to buy an iPhone

1. AT&T or Verizon is your carrier. I don't know why people actually use AT&T. OH BUT IT WORKS WHEN I WANT TO PLAY ANGRY BIRDS! AT&T sucks. If you have AT&T, think about getting something else. The reason you want to slam your current AT&T phone against the wall isn't because it's a shitty Blackberry (more on those later), but probably because AT&T is the worst. Anyways, if you use Sprint, T-Mobile, or one of the regional carriers, don't bother with an iPhone. And it's probably not worth switching to Verizon or <ugh> AT&T to get an iPhone.
2. You worship everything that Steve Jobs & Co. do. You probably bought the original Macbook Air, iPad, iPad 2, iMac, and have every single iPod ever made. You're only reading this post so you can see what I have to say about recommending anything else about the iPhone so you can e-thug me.
3. You want something that's simple to use and you lack the ability to make your own decisions about anything. Also, there are only 4 options when it comes to iPhone and thus your simpleton brain can make one of the only decisions Apple actually allows you to make.
• 16gb or 32gb
• Black or white
4. For some unknown reason, you actually use iTunes. You should be using Amazon MP3s for cheaper music that is also DRM-free. Don't know what DRM is? You don't want it. Switch now.
5. Work supports iPhone and Blackberry only. Blackberry "smart"phones aren't really an option, thus you have no choice. But if you're reading this blog, you're not important enough to have work email on you 24/7 anyways, so this really shouldn't be a consideration for you.
6. Battery life and screen resolution (but not screen size) are best-in-class. If these things are important to you, then get an iPhone. 

Reasons to buy Android

1. Android is freakin' everywhere. Best Android devices to get by carrier:
• Sprint: Nexus S 4G or HTC Evo 3D
• T-Mobile: Nexus S or HTC Sensation
• Verizon: Droid Incredible 2 or Samsung Charge if you want 4G internetz
• AT&T: See point 1. above under the iPhone section
2. You're a giant nerd/geek and like to spend hours tinkering with your gadgets to customize everything, resulting in a phone that sometimes doesn't work. That's ok, you probably have 28 different gizmos that you can use to contact the outside world. But then again, you probably don't like human contact, so this is a moot point.
3. You are near some type of a charger most of the day. Android is constantly connected to every service known to man (Gmail, Google Talk, Facebook, etc. etc.) and this data connection + all of the other crap Android does = battery life that resembles the sexual performance of a 40 year old virgin.
4. You have basically admitted that Google owns your life. Google is Android, Android is Google. Gmail, GTalk, GVoice, GReader, G+...the list goes on and on. If you use Google for most things, then you want Android. I for one bow down to our new Google overlords.
5. You want a different form factor than the typical 3.5" slab of glass/plastic/metal (ahem, so much choice with Apple, ahem). Screen sizes range from 3.7" to 4.3" (generally), Android has slide out keyboards, Blackberry style keyboards, flip phones, etc. etc. The choice is yours, if you want it.
6. You hate Apple.

Reasons to buy Blackberry

1. ...

There are NO reasons to buy Blackberry anymore. If work FORCES you to use a Blackberry, they should be paying for it, thus negating the argument of what phone you should buy (also refer to iPhone point #5 above for more on that). I'm not even going to waste the time trying to find a picture of a Blackberry since they're just terrible pieces of technology. All of you should be shorting RIMM stock. And I was wrong before - if you have AT&T AND a Blackberry, the fact that you're using a Blackberry is just cause for your burning desire to slam your phone against the nearest brick wall.

What about Windows Phone 7 or webOS?

These are great newer OSes, but that's just it - they're a bit new and still immature. They don't offer much of anything that Android or iPhone don't already, and they don't have the attention of the carriers or manufacturers right now. What this means is that they're going to have less support and somewhat outdated hardware compared to Android or iPhone devices. When you're up for an upgrade in a year or two, this might change.

Tips for Buying a new Phone

1. You want a smartphone of some sort. These days, phone calls are too time-consuming and require far too much of your attention to be useful at all. It's all about texting, instant messenger, Facebook, and Twitter. Why focus on one thing when you can experience information overload!
2. Buy a phone on a network that works for you. Your shiny new iPhone/Android device is all but a paperweight if your network sucks ass. For example, if you have AT&T.
3. Get the top of the line device. $200-300 is the asking price for the top-tier smartphones these days, and it's worth it to get it. "But I don't need something that fancy right now!" Well, maybe today you don't, but in a year or so from now, you'll be glad you got the better device since it's more likely for the higher-end devices to continue getting updated and new apps/games will be supported on it.
4. Take advantage of the 14-30 days trials when you get a new phone. If you don't like it, take it back and try a new one. If you're signing a 2-year contract, you want something that you'll be happy with for 2 years, not just for 2 months.